Kids

Here's my 3 lovelies. All very different but all very lovely...not that i'm biased!

Love

This past week i have been overwhelmed by love. Not by love which has been shown to me or by a love for others but by a love for myself. I don't mean that in a big headed way. I realised once i pondered what had changed that i haven't loved myself very much. I have spent many years trying to be someone i was not because, for some reason, i thought people would like me more if i was someone else. I suppose it came from the fact that i didn't really love me so couldn't see how others could. Dave, my husband, really loves himself but not in a cocky way, he's just happy being him. Sometimes i have felt envious of that self esteem. I hoped that some of his self esteem would rub off on me. It never did because it can't. I needed to learn to love me myself. I'm not sure where my lack of self esteem came from, you probably wouldn't think i had low self esteem if you were on the outside looking in. But it was always there. I didn't often feel i was good enough. I didn't often feel i made the mark. And all because i didn't love myself very much. I now feel indestructable. What a contrast. It feels good to love me. It feels liberating to love me. I wish everyone could love themselves. I don't think it's a coincidence that the second great commandment is to love thy neighbour as thyself. How can you possibly love others if you don't love yourself? I have come to realise that my Heavenly Father loves me because i am me. He doesn't want me to be anyone else. I am unique. That makes me even more special. I do not need to imitate others to be loved. I love being me.

Friends

I was walking my friends dog this afternoon and got thinking about friends. I met Tess about 10 years ago. She's from London. She lives in Ullapool with a guy who was raised in Dundonnell (just round the coast). I have no idea how they met. She's friendly and good to talk to. We became better friends after starting to walk up the hill together. Sometimes we go for a run together. We have kids of similar ages. I have lots of friends. I have "kiddie" friends, "doggie" friends, "school gate" friends, "church" friends, "zumba" friends and many other kinds of friends. I have friends who i've known a long time. I have other friends who i've only just met. I have friends who i see every day. I have friends who i hardly ever see. I have friends who used to be close friends. I have friends who i have lost touch with and wonder how or where they are or what they're doing. Some of my friends would do anything they could to help me, others wouldn't go too far out of their way. I have a few friends who i hardly ever see, write or talk to but i know we are still friends. I have realised that the friends that i have the deepest friendship with are the ones whom i have had an opportunity to help in some way. For some that may be looking after their children, for others listening to their worries or working together in church or community groups. I am thankful for these opportunities to serve and hope that when i need help i do not deny them the opportunity to strengthen our friendship by not asking. Thanks for asking Tess!